The way out of the right- wrong game is to understand that each person has their own belief structure. This is a collection of beliefs that you decided were so. For example, let us say that you decided that strawberries are wonderful. Another person that you are talking to detests strawberries. You simply cannot understand how this person can possibly have that opinion or belief because strawberries for you are wonderful. So you begin to question them as if they are incorrect, wrong, stupid, incredibly stupid, or just plain crazy. They have an emotional body that can sense the nature of your questioning and at that point, it is very easy for them to feel attacked. When someone is attacked, they can retaliate or leave or simply not respond. The conversation then becomes strained because both of you are now in resistance to the other person's belief structure or opinion. If the subject is not strawberries, and instead, politics, religion, or some other subject that has a high degree of emotions attached, personal damage can occur in the form of a screaming match, hitting or even killing at times.
For you to have a belief about strawberries in the first
place, you must have acceptance. Once you have accepted that you like
strawberries, you now trust that strawberries are good. You are now trusting,
and the other person begins questioning why you like them because they don't; 'it' goes well beyond the
right-wrong game. This is how wars are created.
The way out of this is to KNOW that each person has
their own belief structure and for them it is true simply because
they have decided it is so. If you can accept that their belief is right and
true for them, it can change how you communicate with others completely. Your
relationships can be transformed.
So, whether you voted for Obama or Romney or you like
strawberries or don't, you have the right to your opinion and do not need to
defend it. For you, it is so. Something you can do is to ask what the person
likes about 'x.' Somewhere in their description will be something
that you can agree upon. Perhaps with the strawberries you both like the color
red, or you both do not like the seeds. You have then been moved from an
adversarial position of being in resistance to the other persons belief
structure to a position of acceptance. You may also find out things you
would not have learned otherwise.
We can all probably agree that both candidates wanted to
help change our country for the better. They both talked about helping
our economy, creating more jobs, being president, taking care of their family, and leading America to new heights, though their methods would
have been different. And so it is with us. Our methods are different but
we can co-exist wonderfully by finding agreement and creating harmony rather
than resistance and disagreement, which creates suffering. So, praise be…to both men and may their
futures be bright and rosy whatever path they are now on. And of course, the
same goes for us!